Courageous Doubts

John 20:24-28

But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”
A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.”  Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.”  Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!”

Lord,
why have people given
Thomas such a hard time?
I mean:
who among us has not wondered
about the truth of the resurrection?

Easter is so shocking
to our senses,
to our normal way of thinking,
to our everyday lived experience.

Indeed the christian Philosopher Soren Kierkegaard has said that the idea that the eternal, infinite, transcendent God could simultaneously be incarnated as a finite human being, in time, to die on the cross is an offense to reason.

Doubts are part of faith!
St. Anselm's motto is “faith seeking understanding."

Or as the father declared to you:
"Lord, I believe; 

help my unbelief"

I think Thomas was among the first 

of your disciples to wrestle

with faith.

I think he is being courageous,

asking the BIG questions,

and not settling for little answers.

Instead he is demanding, like Job,

"I had heard of you

by the hearing of the ear,
but now my eye sees you" Job 42:5

Give me courageous doubts;

such ones that open me to the possibility

of being surprised 

by your Risen Presence

in my ordinary life!

Amen.